I’m screaming at the top of my lungs. The tears won’t stop coming and It makes my sight blurred to see him. All the sacrifice, attention, love, from the past 7 years flashed before my eyes so did her picture. He shouts back. It infuriates me the more, impulsively I run into the kitchen and grab the first harmful thing I see… a knife. Knowing the kind of person I was he runs out the door for his dear life. I stay there for the next 10 minutes ranting and crying before I slump onto the nearest chair . I cry to my heart content and sleep off . When am awake I sit motionless like a rag doll. By now my tear glands has refused to secrete more tears, but the pain right under the left side of my breast won’t go away . My bruises are skin deep and they hurt more worse than hell. In that moment I remembered some of his words “ you did not love me enough!” , then it made me go on a crying spree again, so for 7 years I never loved Joseph enough? I asked myself …
Nothing makes a relationship go sour like infidelity. One minute you think you might have found that someone who makes you so happy then the next minute he/she becomes the sole reason you lose your appetite for food. This topic which has plagued millions of relationships leaves strong hurtful sentiments behind to the people who find themselves in this scenario.
Infidelity which is simply the act of having an emotional or sexual relationship with someone else other than your partner without their knowledge.
Statistically speaking 70% of unmarried couples may have to deal with infidelity in the course of their relationship. And as we may have it infidelity is more common in men compared to women .The national Health and social life survey found that 37% of dating men and 17% of dating women engaged in sexual infidelity. Studies have shown that both and women are not monogamous in nature, though women tend to be more forgiving after they are cheated on than men. As we vary in personalities so does our definition of infidelity do. Where we have some people who view pornography as infidelity while some don’t. Also to know infidelity goes beyond the sexual. There are different types of infidelity that can occur in a relationship.
Firstly is the Object Affair. This is where a person is obsessed in chasing a goal or a career thereby neglecting the needs of his/her relationship.
Secondly Is the Cyber affair. This type of affair is predominant in this era, the tech era. This is where Sex chat and pornography comes to play.
Thirdly is the most common of all, sexual affair. This is involves sexual intercourse without the said spouses.
Fourthly is the emotional affair. This is where one gets attached emotionally to someone other than their partner. This to me is the most dangerous of all infidelities. It tends to have a lot of negative impact in a relationship. A lot are stake when emotions are involved.
Causes of Infidelity.
There are many reasons that could lead to cheating. The most popular one is the sexual dissatisfaction. Men normally fall prey to this. For the men who have high libido that their partner cannot equate, they see cheating as the alternative.
Women who are emotional distant from their partners see that as a reason to cheat. Another reason people cheat is because if self exploration. For women who are virgins, the mere curiosity to know more fuels their intentions to explore. Yet another reason people cheat is because they have been single for way too long that they forget they are in a relationship. In the actual sense you can tell if a person would be faithful if they do not go about having one night stand.
Effects of Infidelity.
Just like a well, the scars infidelity leaves on individuals runs deep. Lack of trust is the foremost of all. Trust which is difficult to build but easy to be lost has the one who has been cheated on insecure. He/She finds it hard trusting the said partner if they are going to remain in the relationship. For those who break up, it leaves then insecure in their subsequent relationships.
Another effect of Infidelity is depression. Romantic relationships which is the greatest emotional investment of all leaves people depressed when it goes South. The loss of esteem and self worth is a phase most people go through after they find out they have been cheated on.
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Arueze Chisom Precious, a passionate writer can be reached through email@example.com