lazy

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You Lazy (Intellectual) African Scum! by Field Ruwe.

They call the Third World the lazy man’s purview; the sluggishly slothful and languorous prefecture. In this realm people are sleepy, dreamy, torpid, lethargic, and therefore indigent—totally penniless, needy, destitute, poverty-stricken, disfavored, and impoverished. In this demesne, as they call it, there are hardly any discoveries, inventions, and innovations. Africa is the trailblazer. Some still call it “the dark continent” for the light that flickers under the tunnel is not that of hope, but an approaching train. And because countless keep waiting in the way of the train, millions die and many more remain decapitated by the day. “It’s amazing how you all sit there and watch yourselves die,” the man next to me said. “Get up and do something about it.” Brawny, fully bald-headed, with intense, steely eyes, he was as cold as they come. When I first discovered I was going to spend my New Year’s Eve next to him on a non-stop JetBlue flight from Los Angeles to Boston I was angst-ridden. I associate marble-shaven Caucasians with iconoclastic skin-heads, most of who are racist. “My name is Walter,” he extended his hand as soon as I settled in my seat. I told him mine with a precautious smile. “Where are you from?” he asked. “Zambia.” “Zambia!” he exclaimed, “Kaunda’s country.” “Yes,” I said, “Now Sata’s.” “But of course,” he responded. “You just elected King Cobra as your president.” My face lit up at the mention of Sata’s moniker. Walter smiled, and in those cold eyes I saw an amenable fellow, one of those American highbrows who shuttle between Africa and the U.S. “I spent three years in Zambia in the 1980s,” he continued. “I wined and dined with Luke Mwananshiku, Willa Mungomba, Dr. Siteke Mwale, and many other highly intelligent Zambians.” He lowered his voice. “I was part of the IMF group that came to rip you guys off.” He smirked. “Your government put me in a million dollar mansion overlooking a shanty called Kalingalinga. From my patio I saw it all—the rich and the poor, the ailing, the dead, and the healthy.” “Are you still with the IMF?” I asked. “I have since moved to yet another group with similar intentions. In the next few months my colleagues and I will be in Lusaka to hypnotize the cobra. I work for the broker that has acquired a chunk of your debt. Your government owes not the World Bank, but us millions of dollars. We’ll be in Lusaka to offer your president a couple of millions and fly back with a check twenty times greater.” “No, you won’t,” I said. “King Cobra is incorruptible. He is …” He was laughing. “Says who? Give me an African president, just one, who has not fallen for the carrot and stick.” Quett Masire’s name popped up. “Oh, him, well, we never got to him because he turned down the IMF and the World Bank. It was perhaps the smartest thing for him to do.” At midnight we were airborne. The captain wished us a happy 2012 and urged us to watch the fireworks across Los Angeles. “Isn’t that beautiful,” Walter said looking down. From my middle seat, I took a glance and nodded admirably. “That’s white man’s country,” he said. “We came here on Mayflower and turned Indian land into a paradise and now the most powerful nation on earth. We discovered the bulb, and built this aircraft to fly us to pleasure resorts like Lake Zambia.” I grinned. “There is no Lake Zambia.” He curled his lips into a smug smile. “That’s what we call your country. You guys are as stagnant as the water in the lake. We come in with our large boats and fish your minerals and your wildlife and leave morsels—crumbs. That’s your staple food, crumbs. That corn-meal you eat, that’s crumbs, the small Tilapia fish you call Kapenta is crumbs. We the Bwanas (whites) take the cat fish. I am the Bwana and you are the Muntu. I get what I want and you get what you deserve, crumbs. That’s what lazy people get—Zambians, Africans, the entire Third World.” The smile vanished from my face. “I see you are getting pissed off,” Walter said and lowered his voice. “You are thinking this Bwana is a racist. That’s how most Zambians respond when I tell them the truth. They go ballistic. Okay. Let’s for a moment put our skin pigmentations, this black and white crap, aside. Tell me, my friend, what is the difference between you and me?” “There’s no difference.” “Absolutely none,” he exclaimed. “Scientists in the Human Genome Project have proved that. It took them thirteen years to determine the complete sequence of the three billion DNA subunits. After they were all done it was clear that 99.9% nucleotide bases were exactly the same in you and me. We are the same people. All white, Asian, Latino, and black people on this aircraft are the same.” I gladly nodded. “And yet I feel superior,” he smiled fatalistically. “Every white person on this plane feels superior to a black person. The white guy who picks up garbage, the homeless white trash on drugs, feels superior to you no matter his status or education. I can pick up a nincompoop from the New York streets, clean him up, and take him to Lusaka and you all be crowding around him chanting muzungu, muzungu and yet he’s a riffraff. Tell me why my angry friend.” For a moment I was wordless. “Please don’t blame it on slavery like the African Americans do, or colonialism, or some psychological impact or some kind of stigmatization. And don’t give me the brainwash poppycock. Give me a better answer.” I was thinking. He continued. “Excuse what I am about to say. Please do not take offense.” I felt a slap of blood rush to my head and prepared for the worst. “You my friend flying with me and all your kind are lazy,” he said. “When you rest your

Blog, Essays

To reduce the political manipulation of ‘lazy youths’.

This world demands the qualities of youth: not a time of life but a state of mind, a temper of the will, a quality of imagination, a predominance of courage over timidity, of the appetite for adventure over the love of ease.~ Robert Kennedy. Recently many of us were outraged because President Muhammadu Buhari said that a lot of Nigerian youths are illiterate and unwilling to work. The outpouring of emotion that followed the news was typical, Buhari is this and that, we must vote him out in 2019, and so on and so forth. It was so intense that some respected and usually decorous people I know were inflamed enough in that spontaneous paroxysm to invoke the ultimate prize upon the president. What a shame! Did the President lie? Of course not, we know the truth, we discuss it daily but some will always find a fault with it once Buhari says so. I have heard valid arguments about the statement being inauspicious given the platform. A President is supposed to market his citizens at any given opportunity, especially on the international stage. I am a hundred percent in agreement with this school of thought but I also find it disturbing that the President’s mention of a planned $15 billion investment by Shell in the country was completely submerged by the screaming headlines which precipitated the viral catchphrase of ‘lazy Nigerian youths’. We have become accustomed to lying politicians who say black in a way that it appears like white, we are used to men and women that dish out well-rehearsed sound bites that avoid the core issues. So when a straight talker says the truth as it is we struggle with it. A friend succinctly put it this way: “we are a nation of hypocrites and we also say this daily, we agree it is true but not a few will still quarrel with it when Buhari says it”. However, this piece is not to defend the President, I ‘ll rather focus on why we must continue to dissect the mindset of politicians intuitively in order to better understand the motive behind their often exploitative proclamations and how government can lift the youth from laziness. For this essay, the following two examples will suffice in illustrating the manipulation of the masses by Nigerian politicians. On March 23, 2000, an unfortunate man named Baba Bello Karegarka Jangedi became the first victim of Sharia law in an otherwise secular democratic nation when he was amputated in Zamfara State for stealing a cow. Before then Sharia was not new in Northern Nigeria, as a matter of fact since Dan Fodio Jihadists militarily conquered large parts of the North in the early 19th century, the spread of Islamic religion included the tenets of Sharia law which though widely imbibed remained a passive penal system. However, the difference this time was that the propagator, a certain Sani Yerima, had an agenda of pushing through religious legitimacy to achieve his political ambition. Prior to this, he had a limited history of religious activity and none of extremism. His ambition to govern Zamfara state was on the platform of the All Peoples Party (APP) a secular political party. But having identified the disenchantment among a largely uneducated and unemployed populace who were fed up with the failure of the political elite he knew he could exploit the opportunity to his advantage. As it were, against the massive federal arsenal at the disposal of the then National Security Adviser General Aliyu Mohammed, little known Ahmed Sani Yerima was elected as the governor of Zamfara state. He went on to fulfill his campaign promise and at the Sharia declaration ceremony in a packed square in the state capital of Gusau Yerima declared that “Without sharia, Islamic faith is valueless,” as thousands of people cheered on the streets. Today, Yerima is a serving Senator representing Zamfara west and the Deputy Minority Leader in the Senate. Since he left Gusau for Abuja he has been dogged by several controversies ranging from corruption to pedophilia. His son reportedly spent thousands of dollars in a lavish wedding and while he will never subject himself to trial in the Sharia court he set up, Baba Bello Karegarka will be one-armed for the rest of his life. Here is a second example. In March 2013, as the build-up to the 2015 general elections was gathering momentum, a certain Senator alleged that 83% of indigenous oil blocks in Nigeria are owned by Northerners, insinuating therein that the rising opposition against President Goodluck Jonathan then could somewhat be traced to this assertion as OPLs and OMLs were due for renewal soon after the elections. He had stated thus: “The oil is produced in the Niger Delta yet it is the people of the North East and the North West and a little of the North Central, almost nothing of the South West and the South East, that are the persons owning and controlling these oil blocks. Almost nothing for the South South, Niger Delta oil-producing areas”. It was not a new allegation, over the years that had been the common hysterical and tendentious narrative designed to mislead the public, particularly the Niger Delta youths who perceive Nigeria’s oil wealth as their sole property of which they have been deprived of the benefits over the years. Again, the difference this time around was that a serving Senator boldly made the claim, and in the hallowed red chamber for that matter. The gullible swallowed this hook, line, and sinker. They went to town again shouting EXTRA! EXTRA!! read all about it and in the usual manner of sharing without caring the story spread like wildfire consuming pedestrians with shallow knowledge and deepening the existing ethnic animosity further. However, the bubble burst when a thorough investigative report by Olusegun Adeniyi exposed the Senator’s devious lie as his list did not only leave out numerous oil blocks awarded over the years to indigenous companies but it also excluded

Blog, Essays

Buhari on Nigerian youths by Tribune.

Tribune succinctly dissects the raging controversy over Buhari’s recent comments about some Nigerian youths in this editorial.. read on   ——————————————————————————————————————————LAST  week, President Muhammadu Buhari was at the Guild Hall, London, where he addressed participants at the Commonwealth Business Forum on trade and investment and how to bring about sustainable development in Commonwealth countries. As it happens, it was not the president’s keynote speech to the well-attended forum that made the news. Rather, it was an aspect of his response to a set of questions regarding investor confidence in the Nigerian economy. Furthermore, and to be fair to the president, he never used the word “lazy” to describe young people in Nigeria. As a matter of fact, his exact words were as follows: “We have a very young population. More than 60 per cent of the population is below the age of 30. A lot of them haven’t been to school and they are claiming that Nigeria has been an oil-producing country, therefore they should sit and do nothing and get housing, healthcare, education free.” While we note for the sake of accuracy that the president did not in fact use the word “lazy” in his reference to young people in Nigeria, this should not be interpreted as condoning his bad judgment. Several things were indeed wrong with the president’s remarks. First, President Buhari was addressing an international audience comprising investors who were eagerly reading the tea leaves on the direction of the Nigerian economy. He had a moral responsibility, as Nigeria’s chief salesperson, to render the country in a good light and pump up its appeal. Sadly, the president failed in this crucial duty. If the investors had any lingering doubts about the prospects of investing in Nigeria, the president reinforced them. Second, President Buhari appears to have a jaundiced and terribly misinformed understanding of Nigerian youths, who have been making a splash in, of all places, London, the venue of his address. If it is true that young people in Nigeria insist on sitting and “doing nothing and get housing, healthcare, education free,” how does he square that with the reality of youth emigration from Nigeria, and the fact that thousands of young Nigerians consistently flourish in the western countries to which the  situation in Nigeria has driven them? As we speak, Nigerians are model minorities in many western countries, including the United Kingdom and the United States, in large part because of the drive, appetite and dogged entrepreneurship of young Nigerian immigrants. So impressed was Facebook founder Mark Zuckerberg with the ingenuity of Nigerian youths that, during his visit to the country in June 2016, he donated $24 million towards the training of software developers. Third, President Buhari, not for the first time, missed a golden opportunity to say something profound about a genuine sociopolitical problem. Perhaps the president genuinely believes that a redistributive mindset is a problem in Nigeria, and that Nigerian youths hanker after handouts. If that were true, the onus is on the president to comment intelligently on the issue, grounding it in a deeper sociological discussion. As it is, we don’t really know what the president concretely believes, or whether he has contemplated this matter with any degree of intensity. What we do know is that, yet again, President Buhari addressed an international forum without any prior preparation, and having failed to acquaint himself with the basics of his subject matter. It is upsetting that President Buhari failed to show that he understands the character or needs of the young people he purports to govern.

Blog, Essays, Monishots

What will it take to awaken a lazy opposition?

There is no better than adversity. Every defeat, every heartbreak, every loss contains its own seed, its own lesson on how to improve your performance next time. ~ Malcolm X In the ‘coup’ that led to the emergence of Bukola Saraki as the Senate President and Ike Ekweremadu as his deputy, a cerebral friend had asked a pertinent question. How will the opposition fare in a democracy where one of the most senior senators selfishly joined an APC led Senate leadership as the Deputy Senate President? Well, it could be fair to suggest that Ike who is a seasoned lawyer and lawmaker stooped to conquer in a future battle but if he ever did stumble upon the above wisdom nugget by the legendary Malcolm X how has he fared as an opposition senator? The answer is that he has performed abysmally if at all what we have seen can be described as a performance. You are free to luxuriate in your cloddishness but smart and politically savvy Nigerians are not obliged to flounder about with you. Any discerning political observer would have known that the applause which heralded Obasanjo’s explosive letter will no sooner evaporate as it effervesced. Even though the former president is notorious for his strategy, Nigerians are often so much in a hurry to move on to the next that the euphoria over that missive was never going to last beyond a week. Obasanjo superintended no democracy and should never be our SI unit for measuring good governance. It was he who boisterously strode across the nation like a colossus for 8 years, taking down all that dared cross his path. He willfully rigged in and impeached governors at his whim and but for Asiwaju’s resilience, Nigeria would have been a one-party state when the ruling PDP swept through the polls by ‘winning’ 28 states in 2003. But this essay is not about the selfish and corrupt nationalist, nor will I waste space on the doublespeak by IBB lest we digress and wander too far. Now let us critically dissect some of the issues. Can you imagine the ruling party in opposition while the government of the day reneges on many of its numerous promises to Nigerians? You see, let us not deceive ourselves opposition politics is no cheesecake. No other person than the Asiwaju himself can attest to this. For 16ys he was in the dugout slugging it out with almighty Villa occupants as the leader of the opposition. Half of that time was spent battling Obasanjo who had little political value in his base, but however, had the required international clout and the equally invaluable backing of political power blocs controlled by moneybag generals who have continued appropriating our collective patrimony since the end of the civil war. I was therefore not surprised when Tinubu described Baba’s tantrums as mere politics, the Ebora Owu could have used other means as he has unfettered access to the presidency. Some will ask if he was playing politics when he wrote Jonathan? Of course, else let the old fox show us Jonathan’s so-called snipers. Or have we in our characteristic amnesia forgotten that weighty allegation which the then opposition milked to the extreme with El Rufai’s scurvy list? Who is spearheading the onslaught? Wike may have installed Secondus as the PDP chairman but the Ikwerre politician is smart enough to know that holding on to his base is imperative for his political survival, at least for now. Is it Femi Fani Kayode whom the majority of Nigerians regard as a junkie that will sing for any government that drops a teaspoonful of porridge on his dinner table? Or Fayose who barks like a rabid dog in the day but sneaks in at night to prostrate and apologise to those he abused? Then we have Reno Omokri, a perky impostor whose primary platform is Linda Ikeji’s blog where he spars with Kim Kardashian and Cossy Orjiakor for social media likes. Just tell me, who is leading the opposition? These vocal few who are supposed to be championing the opposition’s quest to ‘win 30 states in 2019’ are such a laughable bunch that they will be instant hits in the comedy business. They are neither capable of articulating the vision and mission of any serious political party nor are they suited to the onerous task of getting the electorate’s attention let alone convincing them. Sadly, there are few alternatives left in the PDP, for all have stolen and will remain tainted with corruption for life. Whatsmore whatever ace they may have up their sleeves will not be alien to APC which is comprised of strange bedfellows that will do anything to retain the seat of power. That much they achieved out of power, how much more now they have the power and resources. So what will it take to mobilise a robust opposition that can rattle the ruling APC? Who can put together a movement that will convince Nigerians that it cares about our socio-economic well-being? A tall order if you ask me, for in our nascent democracy there is a lot of motion with little movement. We have seen political parties which are supposedly the fundamental crucible of any democracy become opportunistic associations devoid of ideology but dotted with individuals whose major interests are at best self-serving. They have similar manifestos that are often filled with the vacuous rhetoric used to conceal parochial sentiments and avarice. Little wonder then that many have given up resulting in another round of brain drain and a vast number of our people caught in the tragic migrant routes of war-torn Libya. However, we must trudge on because just like they say, Rome was not built in a day. The quest to achieve a just and equitable society must begin with admitting our collective complicity in the bad state of affairs that has plagued our fatherland for ages. Even as we blame politicians for nepotism and corruption, how many of us can honestly say we

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