Home Writers Creative Essays Bruised Ego by Favour Amoye.

Bruised Ego by Favour Amoye.



The Screeching noise from the mailbox couldn’t have been louder- as freckle as it had become after decades of usage, the mailbox could still produce deafening sounds- that’s how good it has been-. The noise it gave out was a familiar one, I had just received my weekly postage sent to my doorstep from the community daily. They were known to give us a weekly round-up of things happening in our locality and the phrase on the cover of the parcel indicated that there was certainly something exciting brewing in the air.

To qualify what I saw when I flipped open the parcel as exciting would have been an understatement, to term it as a lifelong dream would have been just appropriate. There was a tingling sensation when I saw the phrase “Newport County Would Never Be The Same” as a cerulean-colored headline on the cover of the parcel, it made me even want to read it the more.

My excitement reached its peak when I saw the first Article in the daily that read “The Serenading Superstar Returns to Newport”. Directly under it was the picture of my All-time crush, Juliana Mcmahon, the memories of her first visit to Newport flashed back and they all but increased the anticipation and also the nerves ahead of this visit.

It was about a year and a half ago when she last visited, billed to perform as a guest singer on my matriculation day as a freshman at Harper Adams University, she came into town a day early and was having her media tour. As a media enthusiast, I was one of the many people who volunteered to be part of her entourage. I met her backstage and for the first time in my life, I was stunned by a girl’s beauty and virtually everything about her. From afar, her resplendent gown brightened the room and her comely figure- a stem-thin one at that- was all I had envisaged in a young lady. But a quick tap on my shoulder by her soon jolted me out of my mini trance and as I turned to behold her, it was as though the rays of her beauty struck me flush in the face.

My admiration for her prompted me to put in my best shift during the duration of the tour and it was noticed by her as he gave me a compliment after which a quick conversation ensued:

Julianna: I must appreciate your commitment to helping me settle in, Thanks, Buddy

Me: Any…anytime Julie… Julianna

Julianna: No need to thank me bud, it has been a pleasure, but if I may ask, are you matriculating also tomorrow

Me: Yes I am… and I am looking forward to your performance tomorrow…

Julianna: Sure, trust me to bring my A-game, it’s finna be a good time, trust me and my band to bring the heat

At this point, I was so loving her and crushing helplessly on this beauty, even though I stuttered for the major part of the conversation and it was pretty visible- my nerves- as sweat was helplessly trickling down my face, but I so badly didn’t want this experience to go down just like that so I requested for her autograph, and she was elated to give me, pulling my hoodie off, she signed it on the left sleeve and added a caption below it — “ with love from Julie”

The matriculation went as well as it could ever have gone, with her oxbow lips singing beautifully and her crescent-shaped eyebrows accompanying her Virility-brown eyes, she stole the occasion with her rendition, beyond the oath taken to be a student of this August university, I could vividly remember her performance, every word and second of it.

“Jimmy, you have been standing there for quite a while”. That was the Voice of my sister jolting out of my deep thoughts, I had held the parcel for over 30 minutes reminiscing and smiling sheepishly that I didn’t realize that I was stuck right there in front of the door the whole time…

Felicia: Jimmy, you okay?

Me: Erm, Erm I am just fine, thank you

Hope the dishes are washed and erm…I am hungry, is the food ready?…

Felicia: Yes it is, go on ahead, it’s on the dining already, it’s getting cold, you might want to hurry before it becomes too cold to eat, lasagna isn’t a good cold meal.

I soon gulped down the meal down my excited throat before scurrying back to my room, I had only a few hours to hurry up to the mall to purchase my ticket to her show and also acquire a volunteer pass backstage to meet her just like I did around a year and a half ago. My volunteer request was soon granted and I wore the same hoodie she signed back then, all I had in mind was her recognizing me and having a repeat of the mini conversation we had, who would have thought I had an heavy crush on a celebrity who was way out of my league but then,I just couldn’t help it, there was something so different and unique about her.

She was indeed unique and that’s the honest truth, how best could I describe what I saw when she walked right in. Unlike this time last year, she came in for Day 6 of her pop concert around wales and our little county was the next stop.The cheering when she came in was awesome, she literally made the whole county nuts and at a standstill.

She was well revered for her vocal abilities but I always felt her beauty wasn’t talked about as it should be. With her black gown with a lot of flash to it, accompanied by her languid eyelashes of velvet-black to match, she soon finished backstage in her dressing room and mounted the stage, her and her crew performed her top songs that had rocked the whole wales for the past months and true to the earlier phrase in the postage, Newport County Could never be the same after such electric performance.

But the excitement in my mind all through this time was dealt a monumental blow soon after. Now backstage,just like the last time after her performance , she headed to do a little media before heading out to her 7th destination- Cardiff. As her entourage,I had a tad access to her and I capitalized swiftly on that to steal a moment or two to have a similar chit-chat just like the last time. But this time,she didn’t recognize me. All this while,I had envisaged how I would be able to ask her on a coffee date in her time in Cardiff as that was her last outing and in her plans made public,she was billed to rest in one of the luxurious suites in Cardiff which I happened to be billed to Lodge in for a week as I was representing my University in a chess tourney right there in the heart of Cardiff.

Our encounter soon turned sour as she was straight faced all through the while ,for a fact she was visibly tired but I felt that if I could get her to remember the events that led up to her giving me the autograph the last time,that could further bolster my chances in Cardiff but I was dead wrong.

Even the appearance of the jacket couldn’t help salvage the situation as in her words she had signed “many of those” and that she had no “hard feelings to me”,my ego was bruised and for a good reasons. For a year and a half leading to this,my crush on her had prompted me to be bold in approaching ladies. For all that it was worth,my appearance in Cardiff was as a result of me daring the best chess player in my school for a board game and stating that if I did win her,I go on a date with her and eventually represent the school,she was so confident that she accepted. She did play well,but I managed to checkmate her with a Fischer-like move,she was stunned,she didn’t see it coming. Me defeating her gave me a tad of the recognition I craved for just as a lad in my second year of my 5 year degree program. That and so many more culminated into me having the confidence that a shot at Julianna could result into her turning from my crush to my eventual date,she was a celebrity in her own right but I wasn’t deterred,well now I was more than dettered,I was crushed!! .

There I stood with my pride and ego deflated and wondering where I did miss it along the way,the seemingly perfect loverboy, Jimmy Spencer had just had his ego bruised by his old time crush,who would have thought?!. Through an avalanche of emotions running through me,I did the mini interview and I watched her walk away casually but painfully into an elegant carmine-red SUV and drove off. For one,I knew that my little county of Newport would never remain the same but so would I and my ego.

Amoye Favour a student of Obafemi Awolowo University is a poet and copywriter whose writings (mostly poetry) have been published in so many literary magazines such as Literatus issue.

Liked it? Take a second to support Cmoni on Patreon!
Become a patron at Patreon!